For best results, save sounds to disk before playing them.
Take The Simpsons Personality Test and find out which character from The Simpsons you are most like!
The Simpsons Theme
- Opening Credits (343k, mp3)
"Lionel Hutz, attorney at law. What's that? A broken neck? Great!"
- Lionel Hutz (31k, wav) new!
"Hutz is the name, Mr Simpson - Lionel Hutz, attorney at law. Here's my card - it turns into a sponge when you put it in water"
- Lionel Hutz (63k, wav) new!
"I like it!"
- Barney Gumble (9k, wav) new!
"As punishment for your desertion, it's company policy to give you the Plague"
- Montgomery Burns (60k, wav) new!
"Help! I'm being attacked by...uh, things!"
- Mayor Quimby (35k, wav) new!
"I heartily endorse this event or product"
- Krusty the Clown (32k, wav) new!
"Beep beep! Out of my way, I'm a motorist!"
- Montgomery Burns (39k, wav) new!
"Mmm... something"
- Homer (20k, wav)
"Wait a minute... ice cream truck! Me, me, me! I was here first!"
- Homer (44k, wav)
"You tried your best, and you failed miserably. The lesson is, never try."
- Homer (70k, wav)
"What, what, what?! This better be about pizza"
- Chief Wiggum (30k, wav)
"Mmm... something"
- Homer (27k, wav)
"Shut up boy"
- Homer (16k, wav)
"Mmm... slanty"
- Homer (31k, wav)
"Mmm... incapacitating"
- Homer (35k, wav)
"What do you think Smithers?
I think that women and seamen don't mix
We know what you think. Young lady, you're hired!
- Mr Burns & Smithers (74k, wav)
"Mmm... invisible cola"
- Homer (33k, wav)
"Mmm... organised crime"
- Homer (41k, wav)
Itchy and Scratchy theme
- (70k, wav)
"Mmm... barbeque"
- Homer (41k, wav)
"The fingers you have used are too fat. Please mash the keypad with your palm now."
- Telephone to Homer (65k, wav)
"Welcome to the Internet, my friend. How can I help you?"
- Homer (29k, wav)
"That dog has more education than I do. He's some kind of super dog!"
- Homer (41k, wav)
"My worm went in my mouth and then I ate it. Can I have a new one?"
- Ralph Wiggum (40k, wav)
"If anything goes wrong, dial 911. Unless it's an emergency"
- Chief Wiggum (54k, wav)
"Boring!"
- Homer (11k, wav)
"Isn't that cute? A baby driving a car. And look, there's a dog driving a bus"
- Chief Wiggum (78k, wav)
"You call this a super computer?"
- Mr Burns (24k, wav)
"Hi everybody!"
"Hi Dr Nick!"
- Dr Nick Riviera (38k, wav)
"The mail! The mail is here! Ooh!"
- Homer (45k, wav)
"Please come again"
- Apu (10k, wav)
"Captain, Klingons off the starboard bow"
"Again with the Klingons. Mr Scott, give me full power"
"It's no good Captain, I cannot reach the control panel"
- George Takei, William Shatner and "Scotty" (99k, wav)
"Alright! Time for a crime spree"
- Snake (21k, wav)
"Play friendly children"
- Principal Skinner (11k, wav)
"Smithers, there's a rocket in my pocket."
"You don't have to tell me, sir"
- Mr Burns & Smithers (25k, wav)
"Burn him!"
- Grandpa (3k, wav)
"Grease me up!"
- Groundskeeper Willie (51k, wav)
"The doctor I wouldn't have so many nosebleeds if I kept my finger outa there"
- Ralph Wiggum (27k, wav)
"...People see you as something of an ogre. Then club them and eat their bones."
- Smithers & Mr Burns (39k, wav)
"Er, no. You got the wrong number, this is 912"
- Chief Wiggum (9k, wav)
"Why you little..!"
- Homer (9k, wav)
Intel TV commercial featuring Homer and the Super Donut... funny!
- (236k, mp3) fixed!
"Mmm... hog fat."
- Homer (25k, wav)
"Mmm... forbidden donut"
- Homer (142k, wav)
"Mmm... fuzzy"
- Homer (20k, wav)
"Alright brain. You don't like me and I don't like you, but let's just do this and I can get back to killing you with beer"
- Homer (81k, wav)
"Stupid TV. Be more funny!"
- Homer (18k, wav)
"In this house, we obey the laws of thermodynamics!"
- Homer (37k, wav)
"All my life I've been an obese man trapped inside a fat man's body."
- Homer (41k, wav)
"Woo-hoo! Watch that blubber fly!"
- Homer (18k, wav)
"Woo-hoo!"
- Homer (7k, wav)
"Wow, I'll never drink another beer... I'll have ten"
- Homer (49k, wav)
"Hello, my name is Mr Burns.... what's your middle name? ... I don't know"
- Homer (114k, wav)
"If you don't like your job you don't strike, you just go in every day and do it really half-assed..."
- Homer (92k, wav)
"Tell me how may stocks did yesterday... Uh, they all won."
- Homer & Mr Burns (60k, wav)
"That's good"
- Homer (8k, wav)
"That's bad"
- Homer (14k, wav)
"To start press any key. Where's the any key?"
- Homer (39k, wav) fixed!
"Computers can do that?"
- Homer (20k, wav)
"You maniac. You blew it up..."
- Homer (84k, mp3)
"Mmmm, chocolate"
- Homer Simpson (31k, wav)
"Donuts. Is there anything they can't do?"
- Homer Simpson (39k, wav)
"I am Evil Homer. I am Evil Homer..."
- Homer Simpson (85k, wav)
"Hello operator, give me the number for 911!"
- Homer Simpson (38k, wav)
"Mmm... beer"
- Homer Simpson (18k, wav)
"A woman is more like a beer..."
- Homer Simpson (171k, wav)
"Doh!"
- Homer Simpson (5k, wav)
"Remember, a Jedi's strength flows from...mmm, donuts!"
- Homer Simpson/Yoda (58k, wav)
"Excellent"
- Montgomery Burns (18k, wav)
"Hello children, I bring you love... It's a monster, kill it!..."
- Burns & Willy the Groundskeeper (36k, wav)
"Hello. Smithers. You're. Quite. Good. At. Turning. Me. On"
- Burns (56k, wav)
"...I'm doing all the pulling, you blouse-wearing poodle walker!"
- Groundskeeper Willie & Skinner (35k, wav)
"Water it down some more. I can't man, I've watered her down as far as she'll go..."
- Groundskeeper Willie & Skinner (35k, wav)
"There's neary an animal alive that can outrun a greased Scotsman"
- Groundskeeper Willie (27k, wav)
"I don't like your tone. If you are looking for trouble, you found it..."
- Skinner & Stephen Hawking (38k, wav)
"Ha ha!"
- Nelson (22k, wav)
"Uh oh, my heart just stopped...ah, there it goes"
- Barney (64k, wav)
"Burrp!"
- Barney (5k, wav)
"Hey Spock, what do you want on your hotdog? Suprise me"
- Leonard Nimoy (9k, wav)
"Hokely dokely"
- Ned Flanders (15k, wav)
"Absolively posilutely!"
- Ned Flanders (10k, wav)
"Howdy doodely do!"
- Ned Flanders (24k, wav)
"Hellodelodely!"
- Ned Flanders (24k, wav)
Laugh
- Krusty The Clown (13k, wav)
"Aye carumba!!"
- Bart Simpson (17k, wav) fixed!
"Eat my shorts!"
- Bart Simpson (10k, wav)
"Oh no, we're all doomed!"
- Grandpa Simpson (26k, wav)
"... Well, he's had it in for me ever since I kinda ran over his dog..."
- Lionel Hutz & Marge (166k, wav)
"...I've argued in front of every judge in the state, often as a lawyer"
- Lionel Hutz (56k, wav)
"My eyes! The goggles do nothing!"
- McBain (33k, wav)
"I'm Troy McClure. You might remember me from such self help videos..."
- Troy McClure (18k, wav)
"Hi, I'm Troy McClure. You might remember me from..."
- Troy McClure (101k, wav)
